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No idea

June 1, 2011

Being married was like being caught in a bear trap. Being divorced is like being locked in a cage with an angry tiger. Getting divorced was the best thing that happened to me, but it doesn’t make things good. My heart is still broken.

I wish I knew how the negotiations were going so I could tell you, but I really have no idea. If it was up to me they’d be over by now, so I’d at least know one way or the other.

7 Comments leave one →
  1. Emily permalink
    June 1, 2011 4:36 pm

    I couldn’t have put that first paragraph any better! I completely relate.

    I hope your negotiations get worked out soon!

  2. Linda permalink
    June 1, 2011 4:40 pm

    The waiting is the hardest part of everything. I know you guys are working hard to figure out whatever you have to figure out.

    I’m hoping that you two are staying sane enough that if, in the end, it isn’t the right solution, you can laugh a little ruefully and work it out again.

    The waiting, the waiting always kills me. I don’t think we ever grow out of that.

  3. June 2, 2011 10:48 am

    I am sorry it is difficult. Tigers pace, and watch. It is not easy.

  4. June 3, 2011 10:57 pm

    I’m so sorry. What a shitty time. I’d give you my patience, but I have none… I think I may be worthless to you. Drat. I prefer it if I can help.

  5. June 4, 2011 6:38 pm

    I think you are so brave to chronicle your story like this, and I really feel for how negotiations can be agonizing. It is so strange to me how this person I knew so intimately can feel so strange now. It is so *hard* to transition from lovers to business partners and “co-parents”, even when it is better, or what I wanted. The boundaries are so tentative, so shifting, and the issues so private, negotiating under those circumstances is brutal. I wish you both well. And I hope you know how helpful and insightful your honesty is here, and how much I appreciate both of your posts. It is so hard, and it helps to share that with others going through it. I wish you both well.

  6. June 12, 2011 2:19 pm

    I always say that even though my heart is broken, divorce was the best thing. People who haven’t gone through it do not quite understand what I mean about that. I liken it to cancer and chemo. Cancer can be silently living inside you, you find it and you need to get rid of it, even though the process to get rid of it with chemo is going to painful and make you sick. Chemo can save your life. Same with divorce.

    • lolismum permalink
      June 13, 2011 10:30 am

      I am sorry but that is the silliest analogy ever. It takes two people to survive and fail a marriage and there are lots of options along the way to divorce, barring any abuse and other significant problems. Cancer gives you no options most of the time, even when you have chemo. And staring death in the face is nowhere near the same thing as staring at being single in the face.

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